The Etiquette of Arson

Kristy and I have been working for weeks on planning an etiquette dinner for our Activity Day girls at church. We have discussed menus, centerpieces, stemware, silverware, etiquette tips, etc, etc, etc. We've made invitations, menus, and placecards. We had it all very carefully planned. Too bad that it all went up in smoke. (Cue ominous music please....and forgive the soon to be obvious pun.)



So, we are at the church, in the kitchen, putting the finishing touches on our fabulous dinner that we have been preparing all day. Part of the menu was sauteed green beans with slivered almonds, so we were heating a little bit of olive oil on the stove to quickly saute them.



The oil on the stove started to smoke a little bit (not even a lot, a LITTLE bit) as it was getting hot and it set the dang smole alarm off at the church. Just like out of a movie, the lights dimmed, other lights started flashing and a loudspeaker started shouting "danger, please exit the building." Of course we were freaking out and were running frantically around trying to figure out how to shut if off. I ran to the fire alarm panel and pulled off the cover to see if I could shut if off that way and it started sounding off a different (and even louder) alarm. Luckily I was able to get the cover back on and turn the second alarm off. Mind you, the first alarm is still screeching and the voice is still shouting. This is the point when all of the people start showing up at the church. Talk about embarrassing. We were all talking and trying to decide what to do and I decided that we should call the fire dept. to see if they could tell us how to shut it off. I called them and asked them what we should do. They told me that they were moblilizing a unit to come. I screamed NO!! and told them not to come with a fire engine. Could you imagine that pulling up? I talked them into only sending the fire chief in his SUV to turn in off. They finally made it about 20 min. after the alarm first went off. They came in opened a panel and quickly turned it all off. At this time, a man from the stake came and started to berate us for daring to cook in the kitchen. "Don't you know that you can't cook in the kitchen?" "You should have known that you can't cook in the kitchen!" "Are you guys blind, can't you see that there was a partially obscured sign that says that you can't cook in the kitchen?" Forgive us for assuming that a kitchen was meant to be used. We obviously must be stupid to have come to that assumption. (I don't sound bitter at all, do I?) Anyway, even though we were obviously very flustered, the meal went off pretty well. I think that the girls and their moms enjoyed it and if you give me a week I may decide that I enjoyed it too.